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Tuesday, September 24, 2013

Trauma on Tuesdays

Another day another dollar, as the old saying goes. Of course that wouldn't apply to the poor old me, the only seventeen year old who still hasn't managed to hold down a real job. Not applying might have something to do with it... in any case, my only income comes from chores and cleaning the homes of relatives. It sounds disgusting...

This is how I portray myself cleaning...with those exact facial expressions
But honestly it's a pretty great income. It's ironic that I'm a cleaning lady, considering the state my room is currently sitting in.
 I don't even think I have a floor... but back to house cleaning.

Cleaning houses you really get intimate with those whose house you're cleaning on a deeper level. It's amazing how much you think you know a person...and then you clean their houses. All of a sudden, you can sit there and contemplate their use of shampoo vs conditioner in the bathroom. Or whether or not you agree with their choice for dinner as you scrub out their sink. Of course, there are risks associated with being a cleaning lady, such as:
  1. Being permanently scarred
  2. You might never see that person the same way again
  3. Touching gross, unidentified objects
  4. Losing your food, and having to clean it up, along with whatever caused you to lose it
  5. Walking in on someone hanging themselves
  6. Murder
  7. Spending all your hard earned money on moisturizer, as you attempt to bring your hands back to their original, soft, silky form.
  8. Never being able to sleep...ever again
But if you weigh the pros and cons, you'll come to see that the pros (having amazing muscles from lugging all your cash around) totally outweigh the cons. So if you're looking at the stunning dress in the mall or drooling over that priceless Yu-gi-oh card, and you have no job. Clean.

Favorite Quote for the Day:

A woman's mind is cleaner than a man's... She changes it more often.
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10 comments:

  1. Peachezz ^_^September 24, 2013 at 4:47 PM

    Yo that quote reminds me of underwear :p

    ReplyDelete
  2. AnonymousSeptember 24, 2013 at 4:48 PM

    your blog is funny as hell bruh

    ReplyDelete
  3. PattySeptember 24, 2013 at 9:58 PM

    Omgg I love this blog :D Your soo funny !!

    ReplyDelete
  4. someone somewhereSeptember 24, 2013 at 10:17 PM

    At least you have a job. After mid-November, when every Australian finishes their exams, you have a whole new generation of unemployed. Hence, I need a job, badly, and I have to get it. Fast.

    So what would you prefer to do? Instead of the inspirational cleaning lady thing you have going on I mean :)

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. UnknownSeptember 24, 2013 at 10:39 PM

      Prefer to do? Well I'd prefer to not lift a finger and slide down a mountain of benjamins that casually fell from the sky. In all actuality though... I have no idea. If you read Sunday's blog that basically explains my goal from here on out, but afterwards I think Food Science seems to make the most sense

      Delete
    2. someone somewhereSeptember 24, 2013 at 11:35 PM

      This is going to sound really stupid, but I have no idea what a benjamin is :D
      By the way, You being in America means you're one day behind me. Basically, this is time travel.


      Food Science. Genius. You could become famous and appear on Masterchef :D

      I would love to do medical science (not medicine) but that's considering I make it into uni. I'd also like to work in a florist, but apparently you need an education for that too. I checked. Not that you asked.

      Delete
    3. UnknownSeptember 25, 2013 at 7:06 PM

      No actually it was stupid of me for mentioning it. Benjamin Franklin (you know big fat balding guy with glasses, who liked to party and spoke in riddles) is on the cover of our $50 bill. So that was that reference. I feel like the Doctor. Matt Smith is personally my dream boat.

      Food Science is actually more behind the scenes, but I get to eat all day and play with my food. Is there a better job than that? I submit there is not.

      Ooh my sister does medical science, biology, lots of body parts. You'll definately make it into the uni, just show them your blog, you're deep. What kind of edu could you possibly need to work as a florist... i guess the same kind you need to paint nails all day.

      Delete
  5. someone somewhereSeptember 25, 2013 at 10:25 PM

    That's pretty cool. Over here, no one really knows the people on the notes OTL Except for the queen of course.

    Donna Hay did Food Science and she's constantly pushing out new books and has all these TV appearances :D So did Nigella Lawson I think. God what an accent. What. An. Accent.
    A job better than that? I beg to differ. Anyone who has ever worked on the set of any Harry Potter movie has a job better than any other.

    TAFE is for vocational education and training. You get certificates and diplomas, instead of degrees. It's for things like floristry and all those stuff you can't do at uni. They actually have amazing courses and of course there's nail painting (Beauty therapy).

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. UnknownSeptember 26, 2013 at 7:48 PM

      I say we get together and take a course on floristry. I have absoltuely no green thumb though, so I'd probably end up just killing everything before I could arrange it :P Could we talk about accents. Pleeeeaase. I personally am a fan of the irish accent, God I could melt into it. Oh and Matt Smith, I could totally melt into him too, that boy is a dream boat.

      Delete
  6. someone somewhereSeptember 26, 2013 at 11:52 PM

    I say yes :D Come to Sydney.
    Good things take their sweet time, little grasshopper. Patience is the key.

    D-did you just say... I-Irish?
    Sean Biggerstaff. My first crush. He played Oliver Wood in Harry Potter and I was seven and knew he was the best thing that God had put on this Earth of his.

    ReplyDelete

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